The Power of Accepting Each Others’ Differences
July 9, 2021
Maddeline Thomas
Maddy is an accounting associate, social media marketer, and blogger. She has a passion for fitness, fashion and beauty. As a Diversity and Inclusivity Advocate, she enjoys guiding and motivating others to follow their goals and dreams despite the adversities they might face.
Maddy loves spending time with friends and family, exercising, exploring, shopping, and trying new things. She loves to make herself and others happy.
Maddy balances her lifestyle with being successful professionally and pursuing new adventures in her off time. You can check out her blog by clicking this link. Follow Maddy on Instagram @maddy_thomas_arb.
Maddy has overcome many challenges with her physical disability, and she lives her life to its fullest. This post will discuss how she taught people how to be inclusive with her. It is beneficial to look beyond the disability and accept others for who they are. Everyone is different in their unique ways and that should be embraced.
The Power of Accepting Each Others’ Differences
Society has conditioned us to overlook differences because it is not what we commonly expect. I am 24 years old with a bachelor's degree, four years of accounting experience, and I am super active, fit, stylish, caring, funny, and hardworking. I also have Cerebral Palsy. I am proud that I have many accomplishments despite my physical disability. However, people have negative stereotypes of people with disabilities; they cannot have a successful career, are uncool, have fewer interests, and are not trusted with work responsibilities. People with disabilities are judged for their appearance, they believe the stereotype, and this leads to thinking they cannot reach their full potential. Other marginalized groups feel a similar way, and anyone can be an ally. We help each other to become inclusive.
The Feelings of Having Disabilities
Cerebral Palsy affects my balance, speech, spasticity, and motor functions. I have been ignored, excluded, treated like a kid, not respected, and bullied. I have overcome these setbacks growing up, but it wasn’t always easy.
Before the 7th grade, I was accepted and included with my peers and teachers but that changed when I got a controlling one-on-one aide and case manager (person who manages Individual Education Plan for students with disabilities). They expected me to be like the other students with disabilities, but when I did not fit their stereotypes, they made me look like I was disobeying them. I didn’t receive the individualized resources and help that I needed. Instead, I received generic instruction that didn’t account for my personal talents and needs. Even though I was academically strong in math and language arts, I was always placed a grade-level behind my classmates.
It also hurt that my aides isolated me from my peers and acted like barriers for socialization. If they didn’t like my friends, I was pulled away from everyone to a quiet area. What I wanted most in those days was peer interaction and normalcy. I was a happy kid, but it felt like my happiness was being stolen from me when I was made to feel so different. At times, I felt trapped, lacked confidence, and not worthy. In my heart, I knew that I was not living up to my potential in high school, but I was also aware that I wasn’t placed in the right environment to thrive.
Managing Cerebral Palsy is an ongoing learning process. I always have to adapt to people’s reactions. Even though I communicate by typing my responses on my phone, it does not mean I do not have a voice or feelings. I might not look like everyone, but I am still a human being. I had been rejected from many job opportunities, got embarrassed by people who did not want to listen and accept me, and held back by people who doubted my chance of success, but I didn’t let these negative experiences define me. For college, I knew I needed a fresh start. I decided to go to a small private university with a diverse and community setting.
Teaching Others About Acceptance and Empathy
In college, I decided to change that narrative. I joined the student government to show that people with disabilities are great leaders and can represent others. I took the lead in most group projects because I am good at delegating tasks evenly and keeping track of each member. I talked to someone new whenever I had a chance. I hung out with groups of athletes and student leaders. I had an instant connection with my friends I met in college, and they were eager to get to know me. My friends and I bonded over similar goals, characteristics, cultural values, likes/dislikes, humor, and passions. I felt connected and happy in this new environment.
My campus did not have many people with disabilities and did not have negative stereotypes, so they were more accommodating to each of my needs. I taught other college students about how to treat me. When I needed academic help, I visited the tutoring center weekly to receive one-on-one attention to learn my course material. My hard work paid off! I finished my degree in four years, taking 30 extra units (to sit in CPA exams) to prove that I can finish early without being held behind. I received my bachelor’s degree at 21 years old.
After graduation, when I began working at my first job, I started all over by teaching my coworkers to be inclusive. In the workplace, people with disabilities have a tough transition because their coworkers do not know how to interact with them. Once coworkers get familiar with an employee with disabilities, the workplace can become more inclusive. When I was a tax intern, I was nice and friendly with everyone. I talked to each of the accountants, and they included me quickly as one of them. When I started working at SJSU, it took longer to form connections because my coworkers were unexposed to people with disabilities. However, my new manager saw my potential and helped make the workplace accessible and inclusive. At work events, he had me sit with superiors and we had great conversations.
The Magic of Differences
Today I fill my life with family, friends, coworkers, and others of different ages, cultures, genders, religions, and socioeconomic backgrounds. I always look forward to hearing about people’s experiences and discovering our many similarities. Combining our strengths and strategies creates magic because we appreciate each other's differences. We still have a lot of work to do. Especially during this pandemic, people are at home and less exposed to people with differences. Whenever I go out in public, I have the pressure to represent people with disabilities. I might be the only one with a disability that people will see that day, and I have to make a positive impression. This will allow people to accept me for who I am. Accepting each other's differences means less fear of being mistreated. By sharing my story, I hope that I have positively impacted you.
